Epic Battle!

The events described took place at 1:15pm 3/3/10.

I'm standing in my office looking out the window at the car lot. I think to myself 'Man, I may have to skip dinner tonight those wings we-'

"Buzzzzzzz"

I snap out of my inner monologue and to attention. I look around the room in an effort to find the source of the mysterious sound.

"Buzzzzz"

The sound definitely came from my desk. I move closer to get a better look.

"Buzzz"

A wasp appears seemingly out of nowhere flying directly at my face!

"Yeeee!" I squeal as I run to the computer in the other room to tweet my baneful discovery. That done, I return to the office to find the wasp has landed on the door handle -my only exit- trapping me inside.

I have to think and fast. 'Do I have a shoe? Yes. But it's my boot, I may break something if I throw it! Do I have any kind of bug spray? No. Wait . . .'

A memory turns over in my head; when I was working for Spring Mill State Park we used PB Blaster spray to take out hornet and wasp nests. I rush into the garage!

"Please be here!" I say aloud, to no one.

Yes! Light falls on the iconic can of catalyst spray I have used millions of times in my former labor jobs.
(My Savior)

Now armed with a can and a plan, I head back into the office. I edge in slowly, knowing that wasps have the ability to fly, I check all directions.

I spot him resting against the door. I raise the can. Take aim.

"Spissssssh!"

One blast, and the wasp goes down, convulsing. I step on it so as to stop the pain. A wave of guilt rolls over me. I have just killed out of fear. Then another wave of realization rushes over me. "I don't care."

Then, yet another -third wave- of realization hits me. Though the wasp is dead, where did it come from? Why is it alive in the cold March weather? Why was it on my desk? More questions than answers. This journey has only just begun.

I begin to transcribe the events on my blog. I'm now considering if I should send my PB Blaster tip to Bear Grylls. This is a real survival tip. You're welcome.

PS. No White Anglo-Saxon Protestants were hurt during these events.